What happens when you die? Part 4: Communication with the Dead

In ancient Greece, a temple known as the “Oracle of the Dead” was built on top of a sacred hill to provide a venue for meetings between those who still dwelled in this world and those who no longer did so. Today, you only need to venture onto YouTube to find a host of fabulous mediums ready to assist you with communicating to your dead loved ones.

In this post, I’m going to be talking about communicating with the departed. I’ll also share with you why you can’t always talk to the dead, and why the dead don’t talk about love and light excessively and exclusively!

Why do dead people always have cheery dispositions?

I hear many mediums talk about the experience of dead relatives in very glowing and positive statements. They will generally finish the session by saying something like, “…John is always around you. He watches you all the time. Just reach out to him and talk to him whenever you desire and he will be listening…” or “.. John is sending you love and light….” or “John loves you so much and he is at peace on the other side.”

These types of statements make you feel good but they’re just not always true. Your dead relatives are not always hanging around ready to hear what you have to say. And they definitely are not always happy. And they definitely don’t always say “love and light!”

The concept of heaven and hell seems to fuse its way into the popular medium sessions and into their language, and to me, this adds another layer of BS into the spiritual communication. Why the BS?

1. All of the Abrahamic religions forbids communication with the spiritual world (meaning that you cannot connect with the dead at all. It is a huge taboo) – so why do some spiritual practitioners add the Jesus comments or the Christian comments into their spiritual feedback?
2. The Abrahamic religions talk about terrible afterlife consequences for those who don’t follow the faith during their physical life (meaning that unless you are a virtuous person and follow everything that is written in these religious guide books, you will suffer in the afterlife, so how could the deceased connect to the living and say they are having a fabulous time?)

I do understand why popular mediums say positive and emotionally charged statements to a room full of grieving individuals who are trying to find meaning and connection due to the loss of somebody they love. It makes the room easier to control, and it means more people will come back to their shows, to hear positive statements about their dead relatives and loved ones. People don’t want to hear honesty, people want to feel comforted.

On a darker side, there’s more money in saying positive statements than in being honest.  Popular mediums charge anywhere from $2000-$5000 for a 1hr session. They will not be popular for very long should they tell people, “I actually can’t connect with the deceased because the deceased has moved on or reincarnated.” Plus if they were honest and shared the pain and suffering some people experience on the other side, their clients would not return and would find another medium who could provide a more positive and glowing statement.

That’s not to say that I don’t believe there are many honest mediums. I think many popular mediums are really good some of the time. One of my favourites is Tyler Henry Koelewyn, who is obviously an extremely gifted clairvoyant medium. I watched his recent Netflix series where he goes into detail about some of his own challenges nurturing his gift, and the toll it has had on his mind body and spirit. If I had his gifts I would be charging a stupid amount of money as well!

Asking questions to the dead

I’m sharing with you this story about my grandmother because she wasn’t what we would call a witch or occultist. I could argue that many grandmothers and people who grew up in country areas perform what we could call witchcraft today, as part of their everyday routines, however, they would never refer to themselves as a witch.  When the people we love die, we often wonder how they’re doing on the other side. Are they happy? Are they in a good place or a bad place? Why didn’t you leave me more money? 😉 We also may wonder if they have any messages for us such as any tasks they need us to complete on their behalf.

One of the closest people to me in my entire life was my own Grandmother. A little background on her for context, she grew up in a very large family and said they were catholic, however, I never saw her in a church unless there happened to be a wedding or a funeral. She was definitely the matriarch of our family, a proud housewife, with strong values and beliefs that she was happy to share with whoever was in earshot. You could say she was a no-nonsense woman.

As I was the first female born into the family for two generations, she definitely spoiled me and made me feel like a princess. Like all women born in the early 1900s, she was restricted in personal life choices and had to “toe the line” so to say to keep in step with social norms of that time. So when I decided to complete various university degrees at the same time as having children and keeping a family while venturing into various types of businesses, she was both concerned and quietly supportive. I wondered if she had some insight on how I could improve or correct how I am handling my life choices? For example, does she have some nugget of wisdom about my work choices? Such as, “…. it would be better for you to stop working and enjoy life by the beach”, or ” …it would be better if you focused more on your demon based businesses and start a global ministry”.

I know that by the final few years of her life, she was extremely tired and ready to leave her physical body. As a practising Witch, I did all that I could to keep her here with me earthbound for as long as I could, before realising I was being selfish, and let’s just say I released the desire to keep her here. So I do wonder what she thinks of me being a Luciferian Witch? What does she think about the witchcraft and healing I perform on others? Lots of questions like this run through my mind as she did mean so much to me, and I didn’t have the opportunity to ask her this level of question while was still alive.

Through other Coven members who are mediums or have the gift to connect directly with deceased people, different messages have come through from my grandmother from time to time. For the purposes of this article, we reached back to my grandmother to ask her specific questions about how she feels about my life choices, my connection to the spiritual world, etc etc and these answers I will share with you to demonstrate how we can experience the “other side.”

1. Grandma, do you have an opinion on what I’m doing in my spiritual practices or an opinion on the spirits I connect to in my spiritual practices?

Medium response:

She says you have to do what you have to do in this life just like she did. If she disagrees or agrees doesn’t matter now does it? She says were you this concerned with it when she was alive? Why? Out of respect or love? She says your life is your life and she wishes that she would have had the freedom as you do to make those choices. She said in her days people were expected to be or do certain things and you have the freedom to do whatever you want. Are you doing the best you can? If so, then great keep doing it, but if you feel you aren’t then change it. Only you can make that change, no one can make it for you. She said she is not a mushy loving person, but she loves you no matter what you are doing or what you are not doing. You are family and that is what is important, and to hell with society and the world’s opinion on what is right or wrong. She also says that someone will always have an issue with something you do. You could save the world, and someone will complain about how you did it. All she wants is for you to be happy in your own skin. If you’re not happy then change it. And keep changing until you are happy.

2. Grandma, are you there alone or are you with other people?

Medium response:

She was welcomed by a male figure. I am not sure who but she gives me the idea that he was close to her in life. Oddly, enough I initially wanted to say spouse but then she made me feel he was not her husband. Maybe her brother? Or a brother figure? She also shows other family members that have gone on before her like parents, grandparents. She says she is not alone and then laughed and says she can’t get alone time if she tried. It is weird how she describes the other side, like one big gathering but not with everyone she knows; only with those on her same level. She says each person has a level and there will be people we know and those we don’t know on that level.

3. Grandma, are you concerned about anything at all, or have a message for me on what you need me to do?

Medium response:

She is not concerned with anything really. She said one thing death has taught her is that it doesn’t matter what it is, no matter what we do, we are all going to end up on that side and nothing will matter anymore. She said there is no sense worrying about “shit” you can’t change. Are you a worrier? She leads me to believe either you are or she is, and she says stop all the worry about things you cannot change. If the world won’t catch on fire because of your choice or decision then make it with an open mind and clear heart. She says you do what makes you happy and that’s that. Don’t worry about “doing” the right thing or doing what you think others may want you to do. Do what is best for you. She says she could tell you a blue billion things to do but if you don’t want to and they don’t align with you then why would she. She said you are smart and have a good heart, she knows you will do the right thing.

When you can’t connect

Sometimes it can be difficult to connect to the dead, and there’s a few reasons for why this is so.

The typical time of no connection is from the point of death up to around 3 to 6 months. This seems to be a transition time, and many dead people are either busy doing other stuff, or don’t have the ability or skills to reconnect with you here back on the physical plane.

This isn’t always apparent when you’re trying to connect with them, and a medium or you when you’re trying to connect with him or her, may get a general message such as you would on an answering machine, “Hey there! Just to let you know that I’m doing just fine. I hope you’re fine too! Love & Light :)”

In other situations, the individual has already reincarnated or has moved on to do other spiritual things. You will not be able to communicate with your reincarnated relatives. For most part, they won’t know who you are, as we do not remember our previous lives when we have reincarnated into a new physical body.

I will also add here that you don’t always reincarnate as a human. Many times you will find you will reincarnate to experience a lifetime as an animal or some other living object.

(The main purpose for us as souls is to learn lessons. So what we have found is that we keep reincarnating until we have learnt the lessons that we decide we want to learn. When we finally hit a certain level of wisdom, we stop reincarnating and become spiritual masters on the other side. Nobody knows for sure here, but I believe we become the teachers on the other side.)

Questions or thoughts?

If you have any questions for me about what I have shared with you feel free to ask. I know that I find this subject of talking to deceased loved ones absolutely fascinating, as it is not a gift that I possess.